Sunday, March 2, 2008

To pwn or not to pwn - Halo 3: Hamlet style


To pwn or not to pwn - that is the question:
Whether ‘tis greater to increase my kill/death spread
And single handedly dismantle the opposing force,
Or to work with my team,
And by co-operating, capture the flag.

To play appropriately, to TK–
No more – and by showing honour, contradicting
The very reason I game
That is, to pwn–
‘Tis an objective
I cannot perform.

To game, to win–
To win all games. Ay, there’s the discourse,
For in abandoning my team to venture off alone,
When we should be as one, surely,
Must be of the greatest offense.
That’s the misfortune
That accompanies selfish rampages.

For who enjoys following those unwritten rules,
Not the Mauler campers,
Nor the Rocket whores,
The Suicide ‘naders,
Those faithful Team Killers,
The Trash Talkers,
No, especially not the Teabaggers,
Truly the jesters of the FPS Society,
When following these rules
can only lead to bland, uninspired matches.

Who would insist on playing a fair match,
To only capture skulls, or flags,
But that the ramifications are the unbearable silence of being muted,
The loss of stars of your online reputation,
The knowledge that no one would accept your friend request
Because of the nature of your play style,
Regretting your disgraceful habits
Instead of enjoying the game for what it should be.

Thus the thought of becoming virtual outcasts force us to “play nice’,
And thus the glory of absolute pwnage
Is defiled by the online loneliness to come
And joyful moments of seeing Kill:24, Death: 7
With this regard, are no longer celebrations
And lose the grandeur that is: Halo 3.